feng shui life

In the Chinese art of Feng Shui, they say (in essence) that changing the placement of your furniture in your home can change the chi (energy) in your life. 

Never completely understood it, but in my gut I get it - cause I know that anytime I re-arranged my furniture or cleared away clutter in the past, it seemed to shake things up a bit. And now I'm discovering that moving furniture OUT of my house is shifting energy big-time. 

The move just happened on Monday, and while I've still got a few boxes to sort through at my wonderful girlfriend D's home (where i'm living temporarily/for the foreseeable future/while i sort out my 'what's next'), I'm already feeling a new energy rushing in. 

Yes, I'm sad; yes, the break-up is a loss.  The schweetie and I had a lovely relationship and there was a lot of good in it.  But we became friends around the time my mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, and I remember thinking then that although he wasn't really 'my type' (whatever that is), I wasn't going to turn down this gift from the Universe.  He was sweet, generous and supportive; easy going and easy to be with at a time when I really welcomed those things (since everything else was pretty chaotic and stressful). 

And he surprised me - and then I surprised myself - as we forged a connection, got closer, and over time, developed a rhythm and a life. 

But at some point it started to dawn on each of us (in different ways) that while there was affection, love and ease, something was missing.  Some almost unnameable something that seemed to be the key to forging a future.  And there's no way to force such a thing if it isn't there, no matter how sweet and easy the rest of it is.

And so we got brave ... and now I'm solo again.  Feeling hopeful and unnerved, excited and energized, overwhelmed and calm. (a little bit country, a litlle bit rock and roll.)  ;)

Moved the furniture, cleared the clutter, re-arranged the arrangements.  Feng shuing my life.  Bring on the good chi baby.

Comments

[Will]

I'm glad to hear that there wasn't a lot of painful noise and ripping and tearing in this change. I was concerned about that. Sending prayers for good things your way.

[maria]

Deb, I'm glad this part of the transition ... a part that's pretty yucky, in my opinion ... is behind you. I hope you're feeling at home at your friend's and, while sad and melancholy about the ending of a relationship that had sweet parts, nurturing yourself and dreaming about the future. Like Marilyn, I, too, look forward to seeing how your life unfolds from here.

Love and hugs until we talk soon. :-)

[Kerstin]

Physical and emotional decluttering can do wonders and I admire your courage and spirit during this transition of yours. Like Marilyn said, it will be interesting to see what this new chapter will hold for you. I am wishing you lots of good Chi, Deb.

[Marilyn]

Can't wait to see how this next chapter of your life unfolds. Hope you've found a comfortable place to settle as you transition into this next phase. Holding good thoughts for you.