start where you are

A couple of friends recently asked me about my lack of blog contact.  Talking to one of these peeps the other day, I realized what's been going on in the push/pull that's resulted in these long stretches of quiet in blog-land: there's been some stuff going on in my "real life" that I haven't wanted to write about publicly (to all you 10 or 15 regular readers ...) (that is, if you're still there ...), but it's been hard to write about anything but that, and since I wasn't willing to reveal all here, it was easier not to blog ... or to just touch base by writing about the weather.  But I've missed the community that I have in blog-land, and I want to write and be here and engage again, so ...

I've decided to take a page from the stuff I tell the women in my writing group: If you don't know what to write about, or you're feeling stuck, just start where you are. 

And while you may not follow what comes next today; or you might read stuff into it; you might have no idea what I'm talking about; you may wonder what the heck is going on in my life (or if i'm even talking about my life?) ... but if nothing else, for those who have been wondering, here it is: contact ... from where I am.

Mixed up, mashed up.  Coming, going. Too much of not enough but we want what we want and there's no way to stop it even if we wanted to.  Openings, challenges, new roads, and the world keeps on spinning.  (too many spinning plates in the air sometimes ...)  Inertia feels so good, doesn't it?  Doesn't it?  So much promise, so many possibilities, too many choices.  The right choice for right now sings softly and fiercely as bills and dust and to-do lists fly around and we try to listen and try to do better.  Still, we rush on ahead, we wait, get annoyed and fight the urge to flip the bird.  We scratch the itch, indulge the want, wait until the gas light comes on empty.  Worry what they'll think; worry they won't notice.  Wonder if we have it easy (even though it can feel hard) since we have beds to sleep in, food to eat and blogs to blahblahblah in?  What's the gift in this challenge?  What would the Dali Lama do, and why then oh why can't I? 

Let the mind wander, let the pen run, see what shows up. 

(i'll be back ...)

Comments

[wes]

... so nice to see you back ... you were missed ... and you thought that it might not be noticed? Can definitely relate to much of what you write ... what a surprise